Dread Walking Into The Closet? Healing Your Relationship With Clothes

Shopping at the mall for clothes can be an awful experience. Loud music, horrible lighting, warped mirrors, individual's knocking on the changing room asking if you're alright. It can all feel incredibly overwhelming including the potential loud harsh internal voice that might arise around your unique body shape.

Clothes are meant to be altered to fit your unique body, not the other way around! The clothing industry mass produces clothes and puts a size on it for standards that were set decades ago. That label has then invoked so much shame, guilt, and judgment for many individuals if their body does not conform to that clothing label.

Your body shape is unique and deserves to shine and be expressed just as it is. Yet the clothing industry's inability to adapt and accommodate each individual's unique shape and bodily contours leaves a person blaming themselves and their body. Instead of one more harsh negative thought arising about your body and clothing, start getting critical of the clothes.

So what's a different kind of relationship we can have with our clothing? First, there is never ever anything "wrong" or "bad" about your body. Your body will shift and change from day to day and week to week depending upon the weather, your stress levels, your physical movement, time of day, and for a woman where they're at in their menstrual cycle.

We can Marie Kondo your closet and anything that does not bring you joy, that you have been holding onto that actually provokes negative inner voices about this amazing container you're living in, it is time for that to go. If you don't want to part with it, get creative! Cut it up and make something out of that clothing. If you have a sewing machine, make it into a different piece of clothing you can wear that honors your body and how it is now.

Next, when you wake up in the morning, take a moment to check in with yourself. Explore how you feel in your body. No judgment. If you're having a day where you feel emotionally and physically heavy that is alright. Your experience of your body changes constantly. You get to remind yourself this is just for now, this is just this moment, and will probably not be a long term experience so that you can step into a new relationship with your body in that moment that it is alright to feel however your body is feeling that day.

Then, get curious about what clothes would support you in navigating your day with more ease. Clothing can be a tool that can support us in feeling lighter, more empowered, and more accepting of wherever we're at. So if you're feeling tight, tense, heavy, and constricted in your skin, that might be a day to explore wearing flowy, nurturing, and comfortable fabrics. If you're feeling anxious, low, and stressed, you might consciously choose the color of your clothing that brings you joy and peace to look at. If you're feeling light, empowered, and optimistic, you might like to wear something that continues to support you in feeling sassy.

This can be a very different interaction with your clothing that it can be a tool that supports you in feeling the way you want to feel in your body and actually helps you on days that perhaps feel more emotionally intense. These kinds of clothing interactions can support in decreasing judgment around your body shape so that you get to practice embracing and accepting the skin you're in and your emotional experience on any day.

If you experiment with this new relationship with clothing, absolutely let me know how it goes! You can email me at support@stephanimara.com anytime.