4 Tips To Make Anxiety Your Friend

There is a lot of panic going on all around us these days. I live in a sensitive body and my anxiety has been at an all-time high this past week. 

Feeling anxiety is not new to me. It’s something I have chosen to navigate in natural ways for as long as I can remember. I experience anxiety as my friend, which is not something our culture teaches us to do. Whenever we feel intense emotions we are told it’s just in our head, get over it, go do something fun, go take this pill/eat this food/drink that alcohol all to not feel the worry and anxiety present.

I often describe to my clients how emotions like fear, worry, anxiety, panic, anger are like a whining child. If we try to ignore this child, they only get louder and intensify their expression to try and get our attention. 

Since I have been in the thick of attending to myself and my anxiety this past week, I thought I would offer my top tools that when you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious, and full of worry, how to navigate these emotions with more ease. 

1. First, identify the story playing out in your head. There is probably some tape or inner dialogue you keep playing over and over again in your mind. Name the story out loud, write it down, talk about the story with someone you trust. The stories and thoughts are not facts and continuing to play that same tape is probably making your anxiety feel more powerful and stick around longer.

2. Now that you have identified the story, notice where it lives in your body. I usually feel tightness in my chest and my whole belly feels contracted. Once noticing where this story lives, you have two different routes you can go down. The first is to get curious about how your body wants to move those sensations. That might be stretching your arms out wide, rubbing your belly, or playing around with your breath. The other route can be to focus on other sensations. When a more intense emotion shows up sometimes we might feel like a floating head detached from our body. Bring your attention to your feet and your toes. What sensations are happening there? What about in your hands and fingers? You can even play around with rubbing your hands together to bring sensation into new parts of your body.

3. Reflect on what is in your control and stop focusing on what is not. Anxiety can perpetuate the more we focus on the things that are not in our control. Yes, it can be incredibly beneficial to get comfortable with discomfort and strengthen our ability to flow with what is but when you are in the process of navigating the intensity of your emotion that can be harder to practice. We first need to move our bodies back into knowing it is safe. By focusing on what is in our control, we are shifting our attention toward things that support us in feeling empowered. You get to break this down into bite-sized pieces. You can ask yourself what can you do for your self-care right at that moment. That might be taking a bath and putting in the exact smells and bubbles you want. It could be taking yourself out to the movies and having a date with yourself. It might be getting down and doing some pushups or jumping jacks to get out of your head and get into the safety of the present moment. Experiment and do whatever action supports you in feeling like the power is back in you. 

4. Lastly, I use food as my ally here. I also can have intense food cravings when my anxiety peaks. My first go-to question is: If I eat that craved food, how will I feel after? Usually just reflecting on this diminishes the desire for that food as I do not want to feel bloated and in pain. I then get curious what foods would feel incredibly grounding to my body. This usually involves making meals high in quality protein, fat, with fermented foods like kimchi for a good bacteria boost. If fermented foods are not your thing, you can also experiment with dairy-free yogurt, goat milk kefir, or miso soup. By focusing on what foods support you in feeling grounded, it can just make one less thing you’re trying to navigate as you attend to your emotions.

If you have been feeling as anxious as I have this past week, I hope these tools will support you with moving into this next week feeling close and connected to yourself. Be gentle with yourself during this time and know that I’m here for you. Reach out if you’re needing extra support at support@stephaniemara.com. Wishing you ease this next week and talk to you all soon.